Everyday A Little Better

She pulls up her phone to hit a quick reply, "Good morning, you :*" That was a little gesture, morning greetings, but it brings out that innocence of the simple idea, I thought of you just now. She wonders, how often do people take that for granted? There used to be a time, where it would make her cringe that someone would tell her to have lunch. Like, don't tell me what to do! She smirks at the silliness of it all, now that she has finally given in to such cheesy relationship norms.

"Ahh, I'm going to be in my head again if I don't hurry up and take a shower," she snaps. But she can't help it, she adores playing little scenarios in her head in front of a mirror, pretending to act out a dramatic scene in a show. "I've been meaning to tell you," she looks up slowly into her reflection. "This has been bugging me for a while now," she brushes her hair back, "I have been in love with you, for as long as I remember, but I don't expect anything from it, I just wanted to let you know how I feel, because it's--" That doesn't sound sincere, too scripted. She looks up again, biting her lips, "What the hell am I doing." Why do I have to re-enact a different scenario of how I tell my boyfriend that I love him. I've said it, and it was way sweeter than what I'm trying to conjure up now.

She won't forget the moment she told him, but it wouldn't hurt to think of a more romantic alternative. She was a hopelessly inlove fool. Save that story for another time. Time is ticking as she is busy procrastinating getting ready for the day. It's been a weird habit of hers, recreating scenarios in the bathroom for the sake of blowing up creative retorts that she would never get to use. She prefers to just keep these remarks to herself than be a little extra. Her back tingles as she cringes of the possibilities of all the embarrassing things that could happen. For her, there is a perfect balance of comfort knowing she'd rather be polite and not let most of her emotions run her mouth. There are particular times where it would just be unnecessary.

What's interesting about how she handles conflicts is with a neutral perspective. She doesn't conclude that just because she feels hurt, that she is the one in the right. But that's not what goes through her head of course. Women somehow feel entitled to be right. She is guilty of her imperfections, so there will be several attempts to save face before ending up being fair. Chuckling at the hilarity of how people are, she preps up.

As the water hits her scalp drenching the strands of her hair, she feels the warmth washing the cool heavy emotions away. Worries come and go, and today was a day to move on from all that heavy thinking. A day at a time, that's how she was going to tackle it. She takes a deep breath and exhales everything slowly.

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