Thank You, Love.

I could drone on about how you are amazing, and I still wouldn't have enough time to explain it before I could get to the best parts. Beh, between the two of us, you are the eye-catcher of our relationship. No really, real talk. It's probably the beard or the way you show off your dance moves. Or maybe it's that killer smile that you flash like the photo above. That's the reality of how you got my attention, love at first sight :p

Let's start from the beginning. We were out one night, and we were introduced together by your best friend. I never really gave you much notice, I admit, but it's not a likely place to start life changing conversations in a bar amiright? So, we just had little tidbit moments of chatting over music. I admit, I barely gave my time or effort. Hey, I'm weird so you give me a break. I don't play those hard to get ploys, I was just being my anti-small talk self. I figured it was hard to get to know me, so I've always made it easy for a lot of people by just seeing this half of me where I am jolly and easy-going.

So, this never ending debate of what really went down in Laboracay will always haunt our kilig infused memories. Despite what you think, I did have a crush on you. It wasn't that type where I wanted to do something about it, it was a happy crush. I got to be around you with our friends listening to music and being doused in booze. I don't look at it as a fun memory because of the partying rather it was fun because I was making connection with someone who looked like he had a hell of a story to tell. Sure, that night, your friends were teasing us blatantly but it didn't stop you from being poised and well-mannered to me. We have a few jokes to crack about that night, but we had an even longer exchange of life, past, and little goals. Ahh, you offered to walk me back to my hotel, even if I insisted not to despite the sun alarmingly burning our eyes. You told me you liked me :p aaand, I teased, "I know."

WELL, whatever, every time we remember that, we only remember the memory based on the last time we recalled it. Things happened. Now we're here. Sure of the hell and bliss of our promises to each other. Like you said, it won't be worth it if it were easy. I knew how much this was worth it when I cracked and blessed you with my vulnerable ugly-crying-intoxicated-self but you accepted me more for that. For all those times I show you my flaws, the potentials of my demons, and the power of my pride, you step up and accept me for all that I am. You, are my answered prayer.

I tell you this often, and I still don't believe it's enough. I always hesitated showing you parts of me because I might lose you. I didn't want to push you away, but I felt the need to save you from all the terror I may commit someday. I felt accountable for making sure that you don't get hurt, in turn sacrificing the pleasure of living authentically. It was easy to show my awkward moods and silly quirks. It was tremendously difficult to show you the strength I had built up from all the experiences that molded me. I did not want to show the ugly parts. No one does, right? I was as transparent as corrugated glass. You could still see through it, but not quite enough. You were just very patient, and understood all that I needed was time. We've been getting to know each other more, even if I may not show it all the time, it is very calming to know, that you're starting to feel like home. We'll have a lot of rows, but we'll have tenfold more of great memories to make. Like you said, we're stuck with each other. It's a trap!  Hehehe.

Thanks for guiding me back to being myself, the good, the quirky, the forever simpleton to laugh at everything. I'm definitely going to own up to it freely. I see that there are so many ways to look at life, and it's tempting to seek comfort in darkness and get used to it, yet it wastes a lot of potential to compose something better. There will always be something better to do than well in doubt and frustrations. Everyday is the chance we get to make it happen. I can't wait for more laughter with you in this world. I accept you too, as you are with flaws and such, so you may stay the same or change for the weirder, I'll have you as my companion anyway, any day. Thank you Beh. I love you, and you already know that :*

My Instagram