Superficial Living

I read an article a couple of days ago about being Superficial. My understanding of the word is that it is being pretentious, fake, or anything made up for ego purposes. I really had to make sure what it meant so I checked the Miriam-Webster Dictionary for its verbatim definition; 

1 a (1) : of, relating to, or located near a surface (2) : lying on, not penetrating below, or affecting only the surface <superficial wounds>
2 a : concerned only with the obvious or apparent : shallow
b : seen on the surface : external
c : presenting only an appearance without substance or significance.

I have prejudiced the word with a negative connotation to say the least. I have always cringed at the thought of being directly associated with it, for the fear that it was considered in my standards– the new low. I will limit the scope of my observation to the definition of Superficial to 2 c. There will be so much to discuss on the different definitions, but I'll stick to what I apparently assumed the my description to be closest to, and explain why.

I always believed that it would be to a great fault, that if one solely holds judgement based on what we see, there is so much more that we will be missing out on. I didn't expect however, that what my preconceived notion happened to be a likely example of what I ought to be totally against. The word manifested into something else based on my own experiences and inter-personal encounters. I became a product of hypocrisy and hubris by my blindness to such a simple word. 

My story on why I decided to check the details of what Superficial means, is because of this longing insecurity of always being thought of as a certain stereo-type. I have been thought of as a snob, a socialite, and even a elitist, even though it doesn't bother my confidence, I feel that there are wasted opportunities to listen to a new perspective, a new disposition in this vast world. It can hinder a becoming of a new friendship. Being seen skin-deep can have some advantages, but what a waste to not see beyond the potential of a great mind behind that facade.

I have no qualms about what I appear to be. I am comfortable being myself, as far as I can tell, I'm pretty content with how I am going about through societal's pressures. I'm mostly under the pretense of being thought of as insincere. I am transparent with my morals and beliefs, but I don't just offer it up unless I'm asked. I prefer to listen, to learn, to open my mind further to understand. I like to be polite, and to make sure someone is comfortable, and not in a way that I'll please them, but in a.. 'I hear what you are saying' way. 

I asked my Dad about what his take was, on being Superficial and why does looks matter. He told me, "Well, of course you want to look good. It helps you feel good, you'll have confidence, and especially if you have to take care of your health. I would want to shed a few pounds, to lose some weight, but I'm comfortable, but it doesn't mean I don't want to look my best, just as long as I'm not harming anyone, or myself." What he said surprised me. It was just in my head that I expected my Dad to say something generic like, 'just as long as you are happy'. 

I am glad I did not get what I expected, it's a wonderful thing, being surprised. I actually know now, my Dad does care what he looks like. And he isn't even the slightest ashamed because it's what he wants. Maybe, I was bothered to know if it was all right. Like wanting to look good affects what you are to yourself, but it should be a preference as to what your own standards for yourself should be. 

I am empathic, it's something that can never be taken away from me, I really like to relate to another person and it doesn't help that I constantly have this resting b* face going on– I don't realize it anyway. Thinking about what Superficial is has put a different light of understanding of myself. I don't seek to be the cliché of what I want to be. I am many things, and everyone else is too. There's no one way to be someone you aspire to be, you can have many good traits, and many quirky ones too. Well,  I can sum this up to two things; First, I probably really thought about this too much haha, but hey, it's a good thing I know what Superficial really means now. Second, everything isn't all about what's infront of you, sometimes, we have to look beyond what we're used to.

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